The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence)

If ever there was a film that should never have been made, then this turgid fest of doggy droppings is it.

A badly shot, poorly made outing that quite frankly has absolutely nothing going for it in any way shape or form.

The plot, what there is of it consists of disturbed loner Martin who is obsessed by the fictional Dr. Heiter and he sets out creating a 12-person centipede.

In short Martin, a short dwarf security guard and possibly one of the worst actors ever to set his face to screen in the absolute worst follow on film ever. Even the Jaws follow on films look like works of fine art compared to this.

Now the BBFC (UK certification board) initially refused to grant this film a certification, due to violent scenes upon its release. It would have been far better had they done that out of respect for the people who will be bored to death watching this film.

Anyway the BBFC granted the film an 18 certificate after 32 cuts totaling 2 minutes and 37 seconds were made. Far better had they cut the entire film and replaced it with another movie.

As much I abhor censorship in any form, I hear that this was banned in Australia. Australia you don't know how lucky you are in not seeing this film.

It tries to rely on gore over style and content and even then fails to shock.

Avoid. Do your senses a favor, read a good book, go for a walk, if you must suffer a bad film then even Home Alone 2 is a masterpiece of cinema compared to this.

Hellraiser

Even after all these years this is one of the absolute best horror films.

Doug Bradley plays the pin headed monster brilliantly, all backed up with one of the best soundtracks by Christopher Young who scores the film in a magnificent way adding shed loads to the atmosphere. The effects of Frank coming back from the dead still work even now, in fact I would go so far as to say the effects in this film outclass many a monster flick that's made today.

The scenes in the hospital spring to mind, along with some classic gore as we see Frank engage in his less than well mannered feeding on victims.

Pinhead of course steals the whole show, be in firing chains out to his sheer presence on screen that makes the other actors just stage props to Doug Bradley.

The "Cenobites" naturally became one of horrors most well known and loved movie monsters, some of the newer Cenobites in the follow on movies were a tad lame but in the first they work well.

 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellraiser
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093177/

Oh I have covered the latest outing in the series, where Pinhead is played(badly) by some other actor who has probably gone back to flipping burgers or selling wraps of crack. Please avoid that one, unless your looking to get the complete set.

It seriously sucks and blows as a movie...http://therandomfilmblog.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/hellraiser-revelations.html

The Evil Dead

If you go down to the woods today, you might just run into some ancient demons(well if you play the tape and summon the bloody wee beasties up that is)

With a plot that was probably written on the back of a packet of cigarettes this film shouldn't work, yet the mix of gore and splatter over the top effects and often out an out dark comedy makes this one a gem of a film. 

Several versions of this are out - often cut by a few seconds here or there - although the original uncut film has been released and is now thankfully widely available.

Much like American remakes, the snip of the prod nose censor is one thing is dislike. Still the great and the not so good worked themselves up quite a bit over this film, calling it a video nasty and such like. Of course all that did was ensure everyone wanted to see the film.

Some of the special effects have sadly not dated well, but still an absolute classic of horror that every fan of splatter films must own(just look up an uncut version Anchor Bay have one on general release.)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Evil_Dead
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0083907/

Wrong Turn 4

The forth(obviously) outing of the inbred killers. This one is set in some mental hospital and the family are all inmates, of course they escape and start getting up to their normal family fun an games of killing 2nd rate actors and eating them.

Slightly different to the others in that the fourth film serves as a prequel to the previous films.

Bunch of teens on a vacation trip end up in the asylum and soon find themselves on the menu or otherwise killed off in assorted ways.

A fun romp that takes itself none to seriously and is all the better for that.

I actually thought that this film would suck but was quite enjoyable in a predicable sort of way.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wrong_Turn_4:_Bloody_Beginnings
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1865567/

Hellraiser Revelations

With a budget of 3p, this latest installment of the Hellraiser series is the absolute worst. Even Doug Bradley has jumped ship to do other things. I fear not even his fine acting skills could have saved this turkey of a movie, the replacement who plays old Pinhead really should have had spikes driven into his skull to stop his bad acting.

Anyway this turd was made in order to stop Dimension Films losing the franchise, even a few plot twists are unable to polish this particular toilet outing into something decent.

Plot, well there ain't one. Bunch of teens go looking for fun and sex, end up in the proverbial and then Pinhead turns up.

I understand that Stephan Smith Collins who played Pinhead in this film has gone back to a more long term career flipping burgers in KFC.

http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1716747/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellraiser:_Revelations

Alligator 1980

A classic 80's monster film, I can remember watching this when it first came out and upon finding it again enjoyed as much as I did the first time. Mind you for different reasons, the 80's hair styles have not dated well and it has a plot that can be written on a postage stamp.

Girl gets alligator as pet, parent throws down toilet and gator then lives in the sewers. Mad scientist is out doing experiments on stolen pets and thus we end up with a monster roaming the sewers and chomping on any who cross its reptilian path.

Of course the hero a cop with bad hair saves the day, along with token woman scientist whilst everyone else in power thinks he has gone nuts.

A classic in 80's horror an one every horror fan should own.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alligator_%28film%29
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0080354/

247 Degrees Fahrenheit

Possibly the most pointless film ever made, a group of teens head off for some party, decide to take a sauna and then get stuck in sauna and that's it.

No really, that's the entire boring film in a nutshell. Boo hoo we can't get out. Within ten minutes of this starting I was hoping they all die from heat exhaustion and do it silently as the acting skills of said teens was sadly lacking.

In a word: AVOID.

Not even worth the bandwidth to download off of Pirate Bay.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/247%C2%B0F
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1877543/

Pierrepoint

A poor outing that is supposed to cover the life of Britains more famous, or is that infamous hangman Albert Pierrepoint.

It meanders off every which way and tells us little of note about the man and his life. The hangings featured are years apart and it throws into question the death penalty throughout the film. It jumps across the years from early 1933, until the end of his career in 1955,

Still that said worth a watch if you have not read anything about Mr Pierrepoint and have an hour or so to spare.

10 Rillington Place

Drawing heavily on Ludovic Kennedy’s excellent book, 10 Rillington Place delivers an accurate account of John Reginald Christie’s 1940s London killing spree. The movie belongs to Richard Attenborough, who plays the creepy Christie brilliantly.

He is even creepy when doing ordinary things like making a cup of tea, usually before killing some poor lady.

For me though what makes this film is the character Timothy John Evans  played by John Hurt. Hurt plays the fantasist man who sadly for him picks the wrong house to rent. Evans was hanged for killing his wife and baby daughter, when Christie was in fact to blame.

Best of all we get John Hurt putting on one of the absolute worst Welsh accents ever to hit the big screen. "Ah look you see boyo, it was Christie see like but." Not the exact script but funny as anything.

A classic film and all the better for being based on real events. Even if the Welsh accent makes me giggle every time I watch the film, like boyo.

Bait

Another poor shark film, but better than 2 headed Shark mind dental surgery without pain relief would be better than sitting through that.

A bunch of young Australians end up stuck in a supermarket that's hit by a tsunami and hunted by a killer shark. Not much plot, mind not much acting either although at least the special effects are better and include shots of real sharks.

Few plot twists and of course a few brave survivors make it out. Best stick with Jaws, even now not beaten as far as shark horror films go.

Altogether now cue the Jaws theme: DUM DUM, DUM DUM, DUM DUM DUM DUM etc.
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1438173/

2 Headed Shark

Please avoid this unless you are some sort of sadomasochist who enjoys wasting an hour or so of your life on some sub Jaws rubbish.

Some odd shark, yes with double the heads and double the fangs chews its way through an assortment of wooden bland characters who if they stood still could easily pass for trees the acting is that wooden.

A few women expose their breasts but even that pleasant distraction could not in any way make up for the lack of plot, poor special effects and dialog that consists of simian grunts mostly.

The best thing about this film was the end credits.

http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt2043757/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2-Headed_Shark_Attack
A group of friends wakeboarding are attacked and devoured by a two-headed shark. Meanwhile, a Semester at Sea ship, called the Sea King, led by Professor Franklin Babish and his wife, Anne hits a dead shark, which becomes lodged in the boat’s propeller and damages the ship's hull, causing the boat to take on water. Soon after, the two-headed shark attacks the boat and breaks the radio antenna, preventing ship co-captain Laura from summoning help. The group then notices a deserted atoll nearby, so Laura drives the Sea King closer, before Professor Babish takes the students, consisting of Kate, Paul, Liza, Cole, Lyndsey, Ethan, Jamie, Ryan, Kirsten, Alex, Kristen, Kirk, Haley, Jeff, Alison, and Dana, over to the atoll on a dinghy, while Anne remains on the Sea King with Laura and the ship's crew, Han and Dikilla.

Battle Royale

A classic in dystopian cinema, Battle Royale is set in a future Japan where once a year a class of school kids is selected to fight to the death.

Forget the dire and tedious Hunger Games, this one has action and gore by the ton.

Having seen the feral kids here in the UK, I often think that a Battle Royale act would not be that bad a thing.

Where this wins over the dire Hunger Games is we get know the characters and even like some of them, then they offed in assorted nasty ways. Well shot and a great romp of a film.
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0266308/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_Royale_%28film%29

Battle Royale (バトル・ロワイアル Batoru Rowaiaru^?) is a 2000 Japanese thriller film, adapted from the 1999 novel of the same name by Koushun Takami. It is the final film directed by Kinji Fukasaku, was written to screenplay by his son Kenta Fukasaku, and stars Takeshi Kitano. The film tells the story of Shuya Nanahara, a high-school student struggling with the death of his father, who is forced by the government to compete in a deadly game where the students must kill each other in order to win. The film aroused both domestic and international controversy and was either banned outright or deliberately excluded from distribution in several countries.^[1][2]
The film was a mainstream domestic blockbuster, becoming one of the ten highest grossing films in Japan,^[3] and was released in 22 countries worldwide.^[1] It received global audience and critical acclaim and is often regarded as one of Japan's most famous films, as well as one of Fukasaku's best films. Kinji Fukasaku started working on a sequel, Battle Royale II: Requiem, but he died of prostate cancer on January 12, 2003 after shooting only one scene with Takeshi Kitano. His son, Kenta Fukasaku, completed the film in 2003 and dedicated it to his father.

ATM

Bunch of wan, er bankers stop off at an ATM, as Yanks call cashpoints for some money and run into an odd chap who leaves them trapped inside and kills a few passers by for added jolly old fun.

The film opens with an unknown man drawing and organizing diagrams to the song Silent Night. He picks up his parka coat and unlike most folk who wear parka coats, rather than hanging about train stations and primary schools he decides to trap some bankers in said ATM.

A fun romp of a film with a strange ending this is far above the Prom Night slasher flicks that are 2 a penny these days.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ATM_%28film%29
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1603257/
While attending a Christmas party, David (Brian Geraghty) offers to drive his co-worker, Emily (Alice Eve), home. Reluctantly, he allows his friend Corey (Josh Peck) to accompany them. On the car ride, Corey forces David to pull up at a local ATM, wanting to get money for pizza. Corey and David enter the ATM to withdraw money, and shortly after, Emily joins them. When the three are about to leave, they turn to see a hooded figure lurking outside. While Corey suggests they return to the car, Emily and David are reluctant, believing the figure to be a robber. Although they are scared, they realize, though later proven wrong by David, that the figure cannot get in without an ATM card. The hooded figure murders a local man walking his dog, prompting the three to call the police, only to realize they had left their cellphones in the car. While the three are panicking inside, the hooded figure cuts off the heater in the ATM booth, effectively making it colder. David decides to reason with the hooded figure, and attempts to give him 500 dollars, valuable earrings, and a watch in return for their safety. While giving the money to the hooded figure, he runs back to the car, attempting to grab Emily's phone to alert the police. He is chased to the car, gets the phone and realizes the wires have been cut preventing the car from being driven. The hooded figure then attacks him by smashing out the passenger's side window. He escapes the car and is chased back to the ATM booth, unharmed, but drops the cellphone along the way. Emily uses her lipstick to write "HELP" on the ATM booth's window. The hooded man takes the phone, the valuables and the wallet from the dead man.

The Hills Have Eyes.

Even now this is a total classic of horror. The absolute best out a million bland break down and get attacked by lunatics films.

In this instance a family on the way to California, a family has the misfortune to have their car break down in an area closed to the public, and inhabited by violent savages ready to attack. In this case the family find they are lined up to be lunch for the clan of deformed cannibals in the surrounding hills.

Sadly some fool had to remake this and did a piss poor job in 2006, the original is in most instances the best and in my view should be left alone by directors who lack the talent to create something as good themselves.

A classic gore fest that has stood the test of time and is one every fan of horror should own. 
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0077681/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hills_Have_Eyes_%281977_film%29
An old man named Fred (John Steadman) is packing his truck. A ragged and somewhat feral teenage girl approaches. Annoyed, Fred addresses her as Ruby. She offers to trade what she has in her bag for food, but the old man refuses. They walk into a small cabin and Fred scolds her for what she and "they" have done. Ruby says that her family ambushed a nearby airfield because they were hungry and no one passes by their home anymore. She pleads with Fred to take her with him. He tells Ruby that if "the pack", in particular someone named Jupiter, learns what she is doing, she could be in danger. A noise distracts them, and Ruby hides.
The Carter family is traveling on vacation. Parents Bob (Russ Grieve) and Ethel (Virginia Vincent) are driving, accompanied by their teenage children Bobby (Robert Houston) and Brenda (Susan Lanier), eldest daughter Lynn (Dee Wallace), along with Lynn's husband Doug (Martin Speer), baby daughter Katie, and their dogs, Beauty and Beast. They stop at Fred's Oasis for fuel. Fred tells them to stay on the main road. Later, they skid off a desert road and crash, owing to what is later revealed to be a booby trap. Bob walks back to Fred's Oasis to get help. Fred's son and his son's family of deranged cannibals dwell in the wilderness through which the Carters are traveling. They are commanded by Papa Jupiter (James Whitworth), patriarch of the clan. He killed his mother, Fred's wife, during childbirth. As a child, he killed the livestock on his father's farm and later murdered his sister. Fred attacked his son with a tire iron and left him in the wilderness to die. Jupiter survived, and mated with a depraved, alcoholic prostitute known as Mama (Cordy Clark). Together, they had three sons, Mars (Lance Gordon), Pluto (Michael Berryman) and Mercury (Arthur King), and their abused daughter Ruby (Janis Blythe). They survive by stealing from and cannibalizing travelers.

Kairo

Kairo (回路 or "Circuit") is a 2001, a rather good Japanese horror films. Kairo was remade for American audiences as 2006's Pulse(with two equally as bad sequels).

First off don't touch the US remake with a barge pole, it is full of empty headed actors who thankfully get killed off at a rate of knots before they get to damn annoying. Indeed had the entire cast and production crew of the US remake died, that would have been the best thing to ever happen to Pulse and its follow on films.

The Japanese original has better special effects, a million times more atmosphere and actors who can act rather than who appear to have been recruited for giving the director a blow job.

http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0286751/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kairo_%28film%29
The plot centers on ghosts invading the world of the living via the Internet. The film is a philosophical exploration into the alienation and loneliness of modern existence due to technology. Communication breakdown and isolation are the main themes of the film. The film features two parallel story lines.
The first storyline involves a young woman named Kudo Michi (Kumiko Aso) who works at a plant sales company. She has recently moved to the city and her main friends are her three colleagues, Sasano Junko, Toshio Yabe and Taguchi. At the start of the film, it appears Taguchi has been missing for some days working on a computer disk. Michi goes to visit his apartment and finds him distracted and aloof; in the middle of their conversation, he casually makes a noose out of a length of rope, goes into another room, and hangs himself. Michi and her colleagues ponder why Taguchi committed suicide but cannot find any answers. Inspecting the computer disk he left behind, they discover it contains an image of Taguchi staring at his own computer monitor, which is displaying an image of Taguchi staring at his computer monitor, creating an endless series of images. Zooming in on a dormant monitor beside Taguchi's primary monitor, Michi and her friends discover a ghostly face staring out into Taguchi's room, though he appears to be alone. Yabe later receives a phone-call that seems to be of Taguchi saying "Help me", over and over, so he goes to his deceased colleague's apartment and sees a ghostly black image imprinted on the wall where Taguchi died. Nearby, he notices a door sealed up with red tape. Entering it, Yabe encounters a ghost who corners him in the room. Yabe shows up at work later that day depressed, uncommunicative, and ultimately takes to hiding in his apartment. When Michi finally goes to check on him, she discovers that he has dissolved into a black mark on the wall similar to the one that appeared when Taguchi died. Michi and Junko are soon alone at work; their boss has also disappeared. Doors with red tape are cropping up all over Tokyo. When Junko enters one of them, she is attacked by a ghost. Michi rescues her, but the encounter proves too traumatic for Junko, who begins having a nervous breakdown and, having lost the will to live, dissolves into ash.
The other storyline features Ryosuke (Haruhiko Katô), an economics student who has recently signed up to a new Internet Service Provider. Once he successfully accesses the internet, his computer accesses a website by itself, showing him a series of disturbing images of people alone in dark rooms, either stationary or exhibiting bizarre, depressed behavior. At the end of the series of images is a black screen with the text, "Do you want to meet a ghost?" That night...

Apartment 1303

Classic Japanese horror here around the idea of a woman who investigates a whole series of apparent suicides in her late sisters apartment and the ghostly going on's that result.

Atmosphere by the ton and creepy effects and even a creepy weird kid adds to this film. At one point the kid after another suicide has fallen to her death adds "There goes another one."

Good special effects, acting and real characters, all things that seem to be sucked out of US remakes are here.

I just hope that some US director takes this film and makes a dire remake as has happened with The Ring and many other great Japanese horror films.

http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0841993/ 
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apartment_1303
Apartment 1303 is a Japanese horror film, directed by Ataru Oikawa, that revolves around a woman who investigates a series of suicides in her late sister's apartment.^[1] Based on Ju-on horror author Kei Oishi's original novel.
At Sayaka's funeral, her older sister Mariko has been trying to cheer up Sayaka's grieving friends when she soon notices the ghostly form of Sayaka, who whispers: "Mom pushed me." Their mother, deeply devastated by Sayaka’s death, seems to be falling into a world of insanity, which worries and concerns Mariko, who decides to protect her mother by taking on the responsibility of sorting out Sayaka’s estate.
As Mariko's about to enter Sayaka’s apartment, a little girl appears from the next door and asks her if she’s afraid of #1303. Mariko, puzzled, says she isn’t. The girl nods and casually informs her that "all women who lived there had died, you know."
While Mariko clears out the apartment, she repeatedly catches the sight of Sayaka and hears her ghostly voice on phone. Each time Mariko tries to talk to her, Sayaka either stares back or whispers a couple of words before vanishing. During the clear out, Mariko comes across an earring that looked as if it’d been ripped out of someone's earlobe. Mariko wonders if this might be a clue.
After turning over Sayaka’s apartment to the landlord, Mariko meets a police detective, Sakurai, who reveals that he’s been investigating a series of suicides at #1303 and he doesn’t believe it’s a coincidence. Mariko gives him the blood-streaked earring as she believes it belongs to a previous tenant.
Mariko soon comes across a book about the first two tenants who lived in #1303: Yukiyo Sugiuchi and her mother who, during the first few years, lived peacefully together at their apartment. This however changed when the mother becomes abusive towards Yukiyo for hiding food and having her ears pierced, which prompts her to rip the earring out of Yukiyo's earlobe. Yukiyo defensively reacts to her mother’s violent reaction with a butcher knife, then watches while her mother crawls into a closet where she eventually bleeds to death.
Six months later, the landlord visits Yukiyo’s apartment and reveals his plans to have her and mother thrown out for failing to pay rent. Upset and afraid, Yukiyo sees the ghost of her mother, who’s revealed to have been tormenting Yukiyo since her death. “You’ll never survive without me,” her ghostly mother taunts. Yukiyo picks up a teddy bear and after she touches it gently, she walks to her apartment balcony and jumps to her death. Mariko discovers that since Yukiyo’s death, the next four tenants - with Sayaka as the latest - had moved into #1303 and eventually jumped to their death. The police has ruled each case as a suicide....

Prom Night 2008

Possibly one of the absolute worst slasher teen films ever to be inflicted onto cinema viewers. Some bland teen non entity called Donna is off to her senior prom, although a sadistic killer from her past has different plans for her and her friends.

Her friends being a bunch of bland inane plastic cut out sterotypes with no redeeming traits. I actually rooted for the killer in this, although I have to say that the biggest relief was not Donna surviving the boring chases, the things jumping out and well everything that one has seen in a million other teen slasher films but the ending credits.

By far and away the end credits were the best part of this film, knowing that you would never have to suffer this dire turgid movie ever ever again.

Avoid this film at all costs. Instead find the original from 1980, far better in every respect that this poor flick.

Links http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0926129/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prom_Night_%282008_film%29

The Devils Rejects

Follow on to House of a Thousand Corpses, in this the murderous Firefly family takes to the road to escape a vengeful police force which isn't afraid of being as ruthless as their target.

Capt. Spaulding played by the ever great Sid Haig is back with yet more classic lines and for me steals the film.

An absolute horror classic, it freeze frames at just the right time. Cuts away and is nicely edited with a classic period soundtrack.

http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0395584/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Devil%27s_Rejects
On May 18, 1978, Texas Sheriff John Quincey Wydell (William Forsythe), and a large posse of State Troopers issue an S and D mission on the Firefly family for over seventy-five homicides and disappearances over the past several years.
The next morning, dozens of police cars arrive at the Firefly farm, and Tiny (Matthew McGrory) notices them while dragging a body into the woods. Sheriff Wydell announces to the Firefly family that they will surrender outside or face execution. The Family arms themselves and return fire to the officers. Rufus (Tyler Mane) is killed, and Gloria Firefly (Leslie Easterbrook) is taken into custody, failing to commit suicide (her gun was empty) while Otis (Bill Moseley) and Baby (Sheri Moon Zombie) escape. Once off of their property, Baby pretends to be hurt in the middle of the road. When a nurse who happens to be driving by pulls over, Otis comes from behind and kills her with a knife. The two escape in her car and drive towards their specified meeting spot.
They head to Kahiki Palms motel, a run-down windblown place to seek refuge from the law and media coverage. While at the motel Baby seduces Roy, part of the Banjo and Sullivan singing group. While he is off-guard due to Baby’s sexual innuendos, Otis sneaks up behind him, holds him at gun-point and demands he take them back to his room where the rest of the band is resting minus their roadie, who is at the gas station getting beef jerky. Otis and Baby takes the band hostage in the hotel room and Otis shoots Jimmy the roadie when he returns.
Meanwhile, Baby's father Captain Spaulding, after being alerted by Baby about the raid, hits the road to come to the hotel to meet Baby and Otis. His car runs out of gas and Spaulding assaults a woman and scares her son, taking their car in the process. Back at the hotel, Otis sexually assaults Roy's wife Gloria and Otis demands Adam and Roy to come with him on an errand.

I covered the other House of a Thousand Corpses here.

Ringu

Now this has been remade by the Yanks, who put some bint in the lead role. Like most remakes of Japanese films by Americans it was remarkable that it sucked and blew at the same time and utterly devoid of any emotion what so ever.

Just compare the masterpiece that was 7 Samurai against the utter abortion that was the Magnificent 7, still enough of the cheap Hollywood rip off's of classic bits of cinema. 

Seriously avoid the remake and take the time to dig the original out, a far better film in its imagery, the darkness of the plot and far better acted.

The plots quite simple, with some spook a tad annoyed and out to ruin everyone who comes into its homes day and does so in a rather unique way.

Get this one if you don't mind subtitles and want to see a classic bit of horror as it was meant to be seen, otherwise if you need a snooze get the remake.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ring_%28film%29
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0178868/
Reiko Asakawa is researching into a 'Cursed Video' interviewing teenagers about it. When her niece Tomoko dies of 'sudden heart failure' with an unnaturally horrified expression on her face, Reiko investigates. She finds out that some of Tomoko's friends, who had been on a holiday with Tomoko the week before, had died on exactly the same night at the exact same time in the exact same way. Reiko goes to the cabin where the teens had stayed and finds an 'unlabeled' video tape. Reiko watched the tape to discover to her horror it is in fact the 'cursed videotape'. Ex-Husband Ryuji helps Reiko solve the mystery, Reiko makes him a copy for further investigation. Things become more tense when their son Yoichi watches the tape saying Tomoko had told him to. Their discovery takes them to a volcanic island where they discover that the video has a connection to a psychic who died 30 years ago, and her child Sadako.

Jaws

The absolute best shark film ever made, one that sadly led to the deaths of countless sharks afterwards but that aside as a film this still holds its own even now.

From slow building John Williams music, through to the tense build up between the characters. A chief of police who lives on an island but dislikes the water, through to a strange shark scientist.

For its time the effects were top rate and work even now, with clips of real sharks used in some parts. Something that the many dire follow on films forgot to emulate.

A film that even has a classic scare part with a head popping out, absolutely brilliant and yet to be bettered.

Do watch out for the chap in the boat who starts off not wearing any footwear and after having his leg bitten off mysteriously takes time out to put some on.

http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0073195/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jaws_%28film%29
Jaws is a 1975 American horror/thriller film directed by Steven Spielberg and based on Peter Benchley's novel of the same name. The prototypical summer blockbuster, its release is regarded as a watershed moment in motion picture history. In the story, a giant man-eating great white shark attacks beachgoers on Amity Island, a fictional summer resort town, prompting the local police chief to hunt it with the help of a marine biologist and a professional shark hunter. The film stars Roy Scheider as police chief Martin Brody, Richard Dreyfuss as oceanographer Matt Hooper, Robert Shaw as shark hunter Quint, Murray Hamilton as the mayor of Amity Island, and Lorraine Gary as Brody's wife, Ellen. The screenplay is credited to both Benchley, who wrote the first drafts, and actor-writer Carl Gottlieb, who rewrote the script during principal photography.
Shot mostly on location on Martha's Vineyard, Massachusetts, the film had a troubled production, going over budget and past schedule. As the art department's mechanical sharks suffered many malfunctions, Spielberg decided to mostly suggest the animal's presence, employing an ominous, minimalistic theme created by composer John Williams to indicate the shark's impending appearances. Spielberg and others have compared this suggestive approach to that of classic thriller director Alfred Hitchcock. Universal Pictures gave the film what was then an exceptionally wide release for a major studio picture, over 450 screens, accompanied by an extensive marketing campaign with a heavy emphasis on television spots and tie-in merchandise.
Generally well received by critics, Jaws became the highest-grossing film in history at the time. It won several awards for its soundtrack and editing, and it is often cited as one of the greatest films of all time. Along with 1977's Star Wars, Jaws was pivotal in establishing the modern Hollywood business model, which revolves around blockbuster action and adventure pictures with simple "high-concept" premises that are released during the summer in thousands of theaters and supported by heavy advertising. It was followed by three sequels, none with the participation of Spielberg or Benchley, and many imitative thrillers. In 2001, Jaws was selected by the Library of Congress for preservation in the United States National Film Registry, being deemed "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant".

House of a Thousand Corpses

Rob Zombie's finest moment in horror by far as far as I am concerned.

A visceral blast from start to finish and with some great humor by our favorite clown Capt. Spaulding, played by the great Sid Haig and who gets some of the best lines.

Indeed the film seems to have two halfs the bit when the soon to be butchered in assorted nasty ways travellers hear about the urban legand of Dr Satan and the other half when the fall into the hands of the lunatic clan of killers.

Funny, violent and annoying - particularly with Mrs Zombies laugh - its a class exploitation film of the old school and if not seen then one to be ordered at once. No horror fan can call themselves one without this in the collection.

Without giving to much of the plot away, I think its safe to say that you know there won't be a happy ending in this film with some happy character turning the tables on the clan and escaping safe and sound.

Links an bits:
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0251736/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_of_1000_Corpses
On October 30, 1977, Jerry Goldsmith (Chris Hardwick), Bill Hudley (Rainn Wilson), Mary Knowles (Jennifer Jostyn) and Denise Willis (Erin Daniels) are two couples out on the road in hopes of writing a book on offbeat roadside attractions. When the four meet Captain Spaulding (Sid Haig), a vulgar but friendly owner of a gas station and "Museum of Monsters & Madmen", they learn the local legend of Dr. Satan. As the four take off in search of the tree from which Dr. Satan was hanged, they pick up a young hitchhiker named Baby (Sheri Moon Zombie) who claims to live only a few miles away. Shortly after, the vehicle's tire bursts in what is later seen to be a trap and Baby walks to her family's house along with Bill. Only moments later, Baby's half-brother, Rufus (Robert Mukes), picks up the stranded passengers and takes them to the family home....

The Human Centipede

The Human Centipede.

A very bizarre film about some mad doctor (played and hammed up wonderfully by Dieter Lazer) who after a long career separating co joined twins has finally flipped and decided to make a human centipede – first stage – by operating on people and joining them together.

Cue the victims a pair of vacuous American girls who despite travelling to Germany, have failed to learn the language and who's main aim for the evening appears to be their desire to get to some club and no doubt have some German inside them.

They hire a car and surprise surprise it breaks down. Now its about here my sympathy for said victims beings to wane. They obviously spend the vehicle mechanics lessons filing their nails and texting and so make no effort to fix the car.

After a brief run in with some old German pervert who pulls up in the hope of pulling them, they decide to leave the car and rather than walk along the road wander off into the woods. No really they do.

Naturally this brings them right to the home of the mad German doctor. Herr doctor soon has them drugged and tied to hospital beds along with some poor lorry driver who he darted at the start of the film and who he kills off for being incompatible with the girls in the forthcoming operation.

Not that this stops him, he picks up with his dart gun, some Japanese chap- insert your own joke about popping out for an Asian here- and after explaining to his victims what he is up to which also makes it clear to the audience Herr doc gets down to work.

There is a rather silly escape attempt by one of the not to bright girls, who attempts to drag the other drugged girl out rather than using common sense and legging on her own to the nearest police station.

Before you can say “Mad German scientist” they are all sown together and the centipede is created. There are plot holes that one could fly a 747 through in the film and quite a few glaring errors, but that aside an enjoyable romp and Deiter is playing the old mad German theme to the hilt.

I guess the moral of the film is don't wander off into dark German forests and pay attention during vehicle mechanics lessons in school.

Links and bits:

http://www.humancentipede.co.uk/ 

http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1467304/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Human_Centipede_%28First_Sequence%29

The Human Centipede (First Sequence) is a 2010 Dutch horror film written and directed by Tom Six. The film tells the story of a German doctor who kidnaps three tourists and joins them surgically, mouth to anus, forming a "human centipede". It stars Dieter Laser as the villain, Dr. Heiter, with Ashley C. Williams, Ashlynn Yennie, and Akihiro Kitamura as his victims. According to Six, the concept of the film arose from a joke he made with friends about punishing a child molester by stitching his mouth to the anus of a "fat truck driver". Six also stated that inspiration for the film came from Nazi medical experiments carried out during World War II, such as the crimes of Josef Mengele at the Auschwitz concentration camp.

When approaching investors prior to filming, Six did not mention the mouth-to-anus aspect of the plot, fearing it would put off potential backers. The financiers of The Human Centipede did not discover the full nature of the film until it was complete. The film received mixed reviews from mainstream film critics, but it won several accolades at international film festivals. The film was released in the United States on a limited release theatrically on April 30 2010. A sequel, The Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence), also written and directed by Six, was released in 2011.